x
Toggle Content Register or Login  -  March 29, 2024, 12:41 am
Toggle Content User Info

Welcome Anonymous

Nickname
Password

Membership:
Latest: LucilleDZ
New Today: 0
New Yesterday: 0
Overall: 2016

People Online:
Members: 0
Visitors: 311
Total: 311
Who Is Where:
 Visitors:
01: Community Forums
02: Community Forums
03: Community Forums
04: My Account
05: Community Forums
06: Community Forums
07: Community Forums
08: Community Forums
09: Home
10: Community Forums
11: Community Forums
12: Community Forums
13: Community Forums
14: My Account
15: Community Forums
16: Home
17: My Account
18: Community Forums
19: Community Forums
20: Community Forums
21: Community Forums
22: My Account
23: My Account
24: My Account
25: My Account
26: My Account
27: My Account
28: My Account
29: Community Forums
30: Community Forums
31: Community Forums
32: Community Forums
33: My Account
34: Community Forums
35: Community Forums
36: My Account
37: Community Forums
38: Community Forums
39: Community Forums
40: Community Forums
41: Community Forums
42: Community Forums
43: Community Forums
44: Community Forums
45: My Account
46: Community Forums
47: Community Forums
48: My Account
49: My Account
50: My Account
51: My Account
52: My Account
53: Community Forums
54: Community Forums
55: Community Forums
56: Statistics
57: Community Forums
58: Community Forums
59: My Account
60: Community Forums
61: My Account
62: Community Forums
63: Community Forums
64: Statistics
65: Community Forums
66: Community Forums
67: My Account
68: Community Forums
69: Community Forums
70: Community Forums
71: My Account
72: My Account
73: My Account
74: My Account
75: Statistics
76: Photo Gallery
77: Community Forums
78: Community Forums
79: My Account
80: Statistics
81: My Account
82: Community Forums
83: Home
84: My Account
85: My Account
86: Community Forums
87: Community Forums
88: Community Forums
89: Community Forums
90: Community Forums
91: My Account
92: Statistics
93: Community Forums
94: Statistics
95: Statistics
96: Community Forums
97: My Account
98: My Account
99: My Account
100: My Account
101: Home
102: My Account
103: My Account
104: My Account
105: My Account
106: Home
107: Community Forums
108: Community Forums
109: Community Forums
110: My Account
111: Community Forums
112: My Account
113: My Account
114: Statistics
115: My Account
116: Community Forums
117: My Account
118: My Account
119: Community Forums
120: My Account
121: Community Forums
122: Community Forums
123: My Account
124: Community Forums
125: Community Forums
126: Community Forums
127: My Account
128: Community Forums
129: My Account
130: My Account
131: Community Forums
132: Community Forums
133: Community Forums
134: Community Forums
135: Community Forums
136: My Account
137: Community Forums
138: Community Forums
139: Home
140: Community Forums
141: My Account
142: My Account
143: Community Forums
144: Community Forums
145: Community Forums
146: Statistics
147: My Account
148: My Account
149: Community Forums
150: Community Forums
151: Community Forums
152: Community Forums
153: My Account
154: Community Forums
155: Community Forums
156: Photo Gallery
157: Statistics
158: My Account
159: My Account
160: Community Forums
161: Community Forums
162: Community Forums
163: Community Forums
164: My Account
165: Community Forums
166: My Account
167: Community Forums
168: Community Forums
169: Community Forums
170: Community Forums
171: My Account
172: Community Forums
173: Community Forums
174: Community Forums
175: Community Forums
176: Community Forums
177: My Account
178: Community Forums
179: Community Forums
180: Community Forums
181: Community Forums
182: Photo Gallery
183: Community Forums
184: My Account
185: My Account
186: Community Forums
187: Community Forums
188: Photo Gallery
189: Home
190: My Account
191: Community Forums
192: My Account
193: My Account
194: Community Forums
195: Community Forums
196: Photo Gallery
197: My Account
198: Community Forums
199: My Account
200: Statistics
201: Community Forums
202: Community Forums
203: My Account
204: My Account
205: My Account
206: My Account
207: Community Forums
208: My Account
209: My Account
210: Community Forums
211: Community Forums
212: My Account
213: My Account
214: Community Forums
215: Photo Gallery
216: Community Forums
217: Community Forums
218: Community Forums
219: My Account
220: My Account
221: Community Forums
222: My Account
223: Community Forums
224: Community Forums
225: Community Forums
226: Community Forums
227: My Account
228: My Account
229: My Account
230: My Account
231: My Account
232: Photo Gallery
233: Community Forums
234: My Account
235: Community Forums
236: Community Forums
237: Community Forums
238: Community Forums
239: My Account
240: Photo Gallery
241: Community Forums
242: Photo Gallery
243: My Account
244: Community Forums
245: My Account
246: My Account
247: Community Forums
248: Community Forums
249: Community Forums
250: Community Forums
251: Community Forums
252: Community Forums
253: My Account
254: Statistics
255: Community Forums
256: My Account
257: Community Forums
258: My Account
259: My Account
260: Statistics
261: Community Forums
262: Community Forums
263: Community Forums
264: My Account
265: Community Forums
266: My Account
267: Community Forums
268: My Account
269: My Account
270: Community Forums
271: Community Forums
272: Statistics
273: Community Forums
274: My Account
275: My Account
276: My Account
277: My Account
278: Photo Gallery
279: Statistics
280: My Account
281: My Account
282: My Account
283: My Account
284: Community Forums
285: My Account
286: My Account
287: Community Forums
288: Photo Gallery
289: Community Forums
290: My Account
291: My Account
292: My Account
293: Photo Gallery
294: Community Forums
295: Community Forums
296: Community Forums
297: My Account
298: Community Forums
299: Community Forums
300: My Account
301: My Account
302: My Account
303: My Account
304: Community Forums
305: My Account
306: Community Forums
307: Community Forums
308: Community Forums
309: Community Forums
310: Community Forums
311: Statistics

Staff Online:

No staff members are online!
Toggle Content Main Menu
Toggle Content Last Posts
Last 10 Forum Messages

bocca
Last post by tennino in General Discussion Groups on Jan 16, 2021 at 16:56:41

Towns in Frosinone that were part of former Vatican States a
Last post by Italysearcher in Central Italy on Feb 19, 2019 at 09:15:58

Dual Citizenship
Last post by Curci-Ghio in General Discussion Groups on Nov 18, 2018 at 15:30:54

Please Help Translate Letter
Last post by nuccia in Translations on Oct 20, 2018 at 06:18:43

Family in Cittanova
Last post by russojoseph1 in Translations on Oct 14, 2018 at 12:28:20

DNA Testing
Last post by nuccia in General Discussion Groups on Sep 29, 2018 at 10:39:30

Trento -Atto di Nascita - Frazione di Poia, Comune di Comano
Last post by exevans in Northern Italy on Mar 28, 2018 at 00:45:37

Translating written postcard
Last post by mekanic in Translations on Jan 18, 2018 at 13:58:50

Translating written postcard
Last post by mekanic in Translations on Jan 18, 2018 at 13:53:38

State of the Family Record & Other State Records
Last post by debbiemfit in Northern Italy on Jan 02, 2018 at 23:14:28

Toggle Content Help Support this Site
Please support GentediMareGenealogy
Help us by supporting the future development of this site, or simply to say thank you.
Toggle Content EStore
Community Forums › Just For Fun › Jokes & Riddles-Clean Jokes Only › GROWING OLD??

     Forum FAQ   Search   Log in to check your private messages   Login  
GROWING OLD??
Jokes are posted in fun and as the Heading suggests, only clean content allowed. So go on and have a laugh...

Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum Index Jokes & Riddles-Clean Jokes Only Printer Friendly Page

View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
Emmy
V.I.P.
V.I.P.


Joined: Jul 11, 2007
Posts: 1000
Location: Scotland

PostPosted: Thu Oct 29, 2009 3:32 pm    Post subject: GROWING OLD?? Reply with quote

This was sent to me today thought I'd share it with you all

GROWING OLD???

Just before the funeral services, the undertaker came up to the very elderly
widow and asked,
'How old was your husband?'
'98,' she replied, 'Two years older than me'
'So you're 96,' the undertaker commented.
She responded , 'Hardly worth going home, is it?

Reporter interviewing a 104-year-old woman:
'And what do you think is the best thing about being 104?' the reporter
asked.
She simply replied, 'No peer pressure.'

The nice thing about being senile is You can hide your own Easter eggs.

I've sure gotten old! I've had two bypass surgeries, a hip replacement,
New knees, fought prostate cancer and diabetes
I'm half blind,
Can't hear anything quieter than a jet engine,
Take 40 different medications that
Make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts.
Have bouts with dementia ..
Have poor circulation;
Hardly feel my hands and feet anymore.
Can't remember if I'm 89 or 98.
Have lost all my friends. But, thank God,
I still have my driver's license.

I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape,
So I got my doctor's permission to
Join a fitness club and start exercising.
I decided to take an aerobics class for seniors.
I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down, and perspired for an hour
But,
By the time I got my leotards on, The class was over.

My memory's not as sharp as it used to be. Also, my memory's not as sharp
as it used to be.

Know how to prevent sagging? Just eat till the wrinkles fill out.

It's scary when you start making the same noises As your coffee maker.

These days about half the stuff In my shopping cart says,
' For fast relief.'
*
THE SENILITY PRAYER :* Grant me the senility to forget the people
I never liked anyway,
The good fortune to run into the ones I do, and
The eyesight to tell the difference.

Emmy

_________________
Lady Emmy
Back to top
View user's profile
qnana
Mem
Mem


Joined: Aug 20, 2008
Posts: 27

PostPosted: Thu Oct 29, 2009 7:45 pm    Post subject: Re: GROWING OLD?? Reply with quote

Very Happy
Beautiful - thanks for brightening my day!

qnana
Back to top
View user's profile
nuccia
Admin
Admin


Joined: Jul 09, 2007
Posts: 4375
Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada

PostPosted: Fri Oct 30, 2009 3:11 am    Post subject: Re: GROWING OLD?? Reply with quote

Emmy, PRICELESS! Thank you!

_________________
nuccia
Italian Surname Database

Calabria Exchange
Back to top
View user's profile Visit poster's website
JoeB
Explorer
Explorer


Joined: Nov 14, 2008
Posts: 354
Location: Chicago Area

PostPosted: Fri Oct 30, 2009 11:14 am    Post subject: Re: GROWING OLD?? Reply with quote

Haven't been hiding my Easter eggs yet, but each day I hide something. Also have been watching TV reruns with a new enthusiasm. Reading some books that seem familiar is becoming another problem. Smile

_________________
Researching DeMaso, Del Favero, Nebbiu, Valle di Cadore and Pieve di Cadore, Belluno, Veneto, Italy.
Also researching James Blackwell, Royal Regiment of Artillery in Ashton-Under-Lyne, County of Lancashire, England. b:1827 Macclesfield, County of Cheshire, England. d: About 1889 at Garden Island, Ontario, Canada.
Back to top
View user's profile Send e-mail
Emmy
V.I.P.
V.I.P.


Joined: Jul 11, 2007
Posts: 1000
Location: Scotland

PostPosted: Fri Oct 30, 2009 2:23 pm    Post subject: Re: GROWING OLD?? Reply with quote

Guess you are like me Joe my problem is I put things away in safe places and those places are ssssooooo safe even I cant find them- to be more truthful I cant remember where I put them!!!

Just think how I'll enjoy watching my family's faces (either when I'm looking down on them or looking up!!) when they unearth all those sentimental things I've squirrelled away---but one thing for sure it will be like the vault in the film 'Richie Rich' - nothing of value!! lol lol lol lol
Emmy

_________________
Lady Emmy
Back to top
View user's profile
JoeB
Explorer
Explorer


Joined: Nov 14, 2008
Posts: 354
Location: Chicago Area

PostPosted: Fri Oct 30, 2009 2:54 pm    Post subject: Re: GROWING OLD?? Reply with quote

The only things of value around here are my Family Tree files which most of my descendants role their eyes at when I bring up the subject. Hopefully someone will appreciate them down the line (I keep giving them flash drives for their birthdays :-)). Meanwhile, I guess I'll try to figure out where I left my car keys and then go out and get lost.:-)

_________________
Researching DeMaso, Del Favero, Nebbiu, Valle di Cadore and Pieve di Cadore, Belluno, Veneto, Italy.
Also researching James Blackwell, Royal Regiment of Artillery in Ashton-Under-Lyne, County of Lancashire, England. b:1827 Macclesfield, County of Cheshire, England. d: About 1889 at Garden Island, Ontario, Canada.
Back to top
View user's profile Send e-mail
nuccia
Admin
Admin


Joined: Jul 09, 2007
Posts: 4375
Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada

PostPosted: Sat Oct 31, 2009 8:11 am    Post subject: Re: GROWING OLD?? Reply with quote

So then this should fit in nicely..

An elderly gent was invited to an old friend's home for dinner one evening.
He was impressed by the way his buddy preceded every request to his wife
with endearing terms such as: Honey, My Love, Darling, Sweetheart, Pumpkin, Beloved, etc. The couple had been married almost 40 years and clearly, they were still very much in love.

While the wife was in the kitchen, the man leaned over and said to his host,
'I think it's wonderful that, after all these years, you still call your wife those loving pet names ' The old man hung his head.
'I have to tell you the truth,' he said, 'Her name slipped my mind about 5 years ago, and I'm scared to death to ask her what it is !'

_________________
nuccia
Italian Surname Database

Calabria Exchange
Back to top
View user's profile Visit poster's website
Emmy
V.I.P.
V.I.P.


Joined: Jul 11, 2007
Posts: 1000
Location: Scotland

PostPosted: Sat Oct 31, 2009 7:43 pm    Post subject: Re: GROWING OLD?? Reply with quote

Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy Still hope for me yet then .
Good idea to keep this in mind for future reference but more than likely when I need it I will have forgotten it Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy
Emmy
xx

_________________
Lady Emmy
Back to top
View user's profile
  Page 1 of 1All times are GMT - 4 Hours

Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum Index Jokes & Riddles-Clean Jokes Only Printer Friendly Page

  
 
Jump to:  



You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
You cannot attach files in this forum
You cannot download files in this forum



Hosted By Site5.com
The logos and trademarks used on this site are the property of Gente di Mare Genealogy.
We are not responsible for comments posted by our users, as they are the opinions of the poster.
Interactive software released under GNU GPL, Code Credits, Privacy Policy
TCD_ItalianGene © Gente di Mare Genealogy